The Paradox of Change (inspiring people to talk)

Understanding Infidelity & The Many Faces of Affairs - POC #021

• Elliot, Fifi, Lottie • Season 1 • Episode 21

📢 Episode 21: The Truth About Infidelity, Affairs, & Healing Relationships

đź’” Why do people cheat? How does limerence (obsessive attraction) impact relationships? Can couples repair trust after an affair? In this episode of The Paradox of Change, Elliot Burgess explores infidelity, emotional affairs, attachment theory, and the complex emotions of betrayal.


🔎 Topics Covered:
 âś… Types of Affairs: Emotional, Physical, Financial, & Online Affairs
 âś… Attachment Theory & Infidelity: How Childhood Influences Relationship Choices
 âś… Limerence & The Science of Attraction: Why Some Affairs Feel Addictive
 âś… Healing After Cheating: Steps to Rebuild Trust & Navigate Forgiveness
 âś… The Role of Transparency & Boundaries in Preventing Affairs
 âś… Gottman’s Four Horsemen of Relationship Breakdown & How to Fix It
🎧 Listen to the full episode & subscribe for more deep conversations on relationships, psychology, and change.

Additional Help:

Esther Perel:
"Rethinking Infidelity: A Talk for Anyone Who Has Ever Loved" (TED Talk):
In this insightful talk, Esther Perel explores the complexities of infidelity, discussing why people cheat and how couples can navigate the aftermath.
Watch the TED Talk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2AUat93a8Q

"Infidelity: Why I Wrote a Book About America's Most Controversial Topic":
Perel discusses the ubiquity of infidelity and the importance of addressing it openly.
Read the Article: https://www.estherperel.com/blog/infidelity-why-i-wrote-a-book-about-americas-most-controversial-topic

John Gottman:
"The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling":
Gottman identifies four detrimental communication behaviors that can predict the end of a relationship and offers insights into recognizing and addressing them.

Read the Article: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/

"The Four Horsemen: The Antidotes":
This piece provides strategies to counteract the Four Horsemen behaviors, promoting healthier communication patterns in relationships.
Read the Article: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-the-antidotes/

These resources offer profound insights into understanding and improving relationship dynamics, particularly concerning infidelity and communication challenges.

đź“Ś Timestamps:
 00:00 Understanding Infidelity: A Complex Topic
 02:52 Physical vs Emotional Affairs: What’s the Difference?
 05:59 Limerence: The Science of Obsessive Love & Affairs
 09:02 Types of Infidelity: Beyond the Obvious Signs
 12:06 The Role of Remorse in Repairing Relationships
 14:51 Why Too Many Details About an Affair Can Be Harmful
 18:02 How Affairs Begin: The Cup of Tea Syndrome
 21:13 Online Affairs & The New Challenges in Modern Relationships
 23:48 The Importance of Intimacy in Relationship Repair
 26:51 Vulnerability & Communication: The Key to Preventing Affairs
 31:48 Navigating the Emotional Pain & Grief Cycle of Infidelity
 37:25 Forgiveness & Rebuilding Trust After Betrayal
 40:54 The Role of Transparency & Boundaries in Relationships
 45:27 Can Relationships Grow After Infidelity?

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📢 If you’ve experienced infidelity or are working through trust issues, let us know your thoughts in the comments! ⬇️
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đź’” why did my boyfriend cheat on me?
đź’” why did my girlfriend cheat on me?
đź’” why did my partner cheat on me?

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