The Relationship Podcast - There has to be an I before We!
Welcome to The Paradox of Change, where three experienced therapists guide you through the essential truth:
I B4We - You have to have a relationship with yourself before you can have a relationship with others!
We believe in understanding your needs, boundaries, and capacity for connection - because the most important relationship you'll ever have is the one with yourself.
Meet Your Guides:
Elliot Burgess - Individual therapist specializing in men's mental health and the foundational "I" work that transforms all relationships
Lottie Passell-Syms - Sex and intimacy specialist dedicated to couples therapy, helping partners navigate the "We" journey through deeper connection and authentic communication and better sex.
Fi Sclif - Individual therapy and growth coaching focusing on mindset, money, and marketing
What You'll Discover:
• How self-discovery leads to relationship mastery
• Lottie's proven couples therapy techniques for rebuilding intimacy and trust
• Practical tools for infidelity recovery, trauma healing, and authentic communication
• Insights into masculinity, femininity, and identity development
• Strategies for navigating divorce, dating after trauma, and co-parenting
• Real conversations about narcissistic abuse recovery and neurodiversity in relationships
Our Philosophy:
Inspired by Carl Rogers' wisdom: "When a client accepts themselves as they are, the curious paradox is that they then change." Whether you're working on yourself individually or as a couple, transformation starts within - heal your relationship with yourself, and watch every other relationship in your life flourish.
Content You Can Expect:
• Deep-dive conversations with mental health experts
• Individual growth episodes ("The I Series") with Elliot, Fi & Lottie
• Couples-focused content ("The We Series") with Lottie's expertise
• "I B4We Deep Dives" - All three tackling complex topics together
• Real stories of resilience and recovery
• Practical tools you can use immediately
Whether you're single and working on yourself, in a relationship needing guidance, or navigating life transitions, we're here as your collaborative guides, not distant experts, but fellow travelers who've walked these paths.
New episodes every two weeks “|” 26+ episodes available now!
Subscribe and join our community of people choosing accountability and growth!
https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange
The Relationship Podcast - There has to be an I before We!
Men are losing their masculinity
This weeks episode, Rob Tearle shares his journey from being an engineer to becoming a therapist, highlighting the importance of addressing male mental health issues. He discusses the societal pressures on masculinity, the stigma surrounding therapy for men, and the need for male role models. Rob emphasises the significance of vulnerability and emotional well-being, encouraging men to seek help and embrace their feelings. The discussion also touches on the challenges faced during therapy training and the transformative power of counselling in personal development, remembering to be a controlled monster!
Reference:
No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover. https://amzn.eu/d/9hNzc3e
Jordan Peterson Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gYpCIbZjUQ
Takeaways
Men are increasingly losing their sense of masculinity.
Suicide rates among men are alarmingly high.
Therapy can be a powerful tool for personal growth.
The transition from engineering to therapy was significant for me.
Listening skills are crucial in counselling.
Men often struggle with societal expectations of masculinity.
There is a need for more male role models in society.
Balancing vulnerability and masculinity is essential.
Emotional well-being is vital for personal development.
Seeking therapy is a brave and beneficial step.
Sound Bites
"I didn't want to be a dedicated male therapist."
"Men are losing their masculinity."
"Suicide rates are four times that of women."
"There's a massive lack of male role models."
"Men shouldn't be punished for their urges."
"You have to choose a relationship."
"It's about accountability and responsibility."
"Just do it, go to therapy."
"Therapy helps, it's going to feel incredibly hard."
Chapters
00:00 The Journey to Therapy: A Personal Story
03:13 Understanding Masculinity and Mental Health
06:09 The Role of Therapy in Personal Development
08:57 Transitioning from Engineering to Counseling
11:53 Training and the Importance of Listening Skills
14:49 Challenges in the Therapeutic Journey
18:12 Addressing Male Mental Health Issues
20:59 Cultural Shifts in Masculinity
23:53 The Need for Male Role Models
26:49 Balancing Masculinity and Vulnerability
29:59 Finding Drive and Purpose in Life
32:46 The Importance of Emotional Well-being
36:08 Advice for Men Considering Therapy
Tune in, turn up, and let's talk! Because as we all know, change happens when we accept ourselves... even if 'ourselves' is someone who can't decide what to have for dinner. Let's embrace the paradox, one episode at a time!"
https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange
How to find us: https://linktr.ee/theparadoxofchange
